Dear Miss Manners: While having lunch at a casual restaurant, I noticed a woman join a large group who were all standing around before sitting at their table. I immediately noticed that her zipper was unzipped and that her underwear was quite visible.
At first she stood a little off and I wondered if I should whisper to her that she was unbuttoned. I waited too long to decide before she and the group started to settle.
I asked the people at my table what they would do and most said they wouldn’t tell her anything. I felt like I’d rather be told by a stranger (who I’ll probably never see again) so I can quickly go to the bathroom and zip it up before — hopefully — anyone in my party (who I’ll see again) notices. If I hadn’t been told, once I realized I had my zipper undone the whole time, I would have been embarrassed and wondering who in my party noticed.
I’m curious about the proper etiquette in this situation.
GENTLE READER: If you find yourself saying, “Someone should say something…”, remember that you are someone. Say something. Subtly and to the side, of course. As you mentioned, you would appreciate it if someone did it for you.
But now you have the advantage of knowing that none of the people at your table that evening will be that someone. Miss Manners advises you to pay special attention to the zips and spinach the next time you are in their company.
(Send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or by mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
COPYRIGHT 2025 JUDITH MARTIN
DISTRIBUTED BY ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION
1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106; 816-581-7500
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